No I do not have cancer, but I do have to go to the Cancer Care Clinic for my hematologist (one of my many specialists). Every time I go there I am humbled.
There was one European family who was waiting for an interpreter. I paid attention because I was just leaving the bathroom when I saw the interpreter walk in and although I did not realize she was an interpreter I remember thinking “She looks well, she doesn’t look like a patient”. So then when she walked into the waiting area after I sat down – she looked so well that the family who needed her asked her if she was the interpreter as well, they could tell right away she wasn’t a patient.
I believe the daughter (who looked as old as my mother) was explaining that the interpreter was for her mother (Who I presume had cancer). In walked another woman who I thought was part of the family but in her early 40s and she was bringing in a woman who again, looked as old as my mother – who was blind and couldn’t talk except make noises, and had obvious physical disability (using a walker – barely).
I want to make it very clear that I have been around many disabled children, and even adults, with various disabilities and I feel quite comfortable in situations like that but I have never seen someone with this many obvious challenges that was of this age. I was a bit startled. They introduced her to the interpreter by making them touch (due to her not being able to see). It suddenly hit me why they were all there. Who was going to look after this grown woman with disabilities if her mother (who I assume was in her late 80s) couldn’t look after her daughter anymore?
I realized that part of that meeting probably had to do with explaining this to the severely disabled daughter and a plan of action to go forward on how to go about it in the best way. I started wondering a bit more about this 80+ year old woman who had raised a severely disabled daughter for 60+ years. What strength, what sadness, but how much more difficult it would be to know at that age, that you still have children that need caring for that you can no longer take care of due to your own health? My heart broke for them. I gave them my best smile as they slowly walked down to the doctor’s office (mother and daughter in walkers) but I was unsure if that was even the proper reaction due to the challenges they had ahead of them. I don’t think I would be up for smiling if I was in that situation.
Obviously I have no power to change their situation but I guess it makes me wonder if there is anything small to brighten their day. I have not had cancer (knock on wood), but I do know that I would need to find things to keep my mind positive – similar (but very different) to how I am looking for positive things to focus on now with an upcoming surgery.
The ultimate problem cannot be changed or fixed.. so you could only focus on the smaller things to find joy.
I know this sounds silly but I want my toes painted – fun colors so that when I see my feet at the end of the bed I can focus on the toes while dealing with uncomfortable situations (i.e. people about to help you go to the bathroom and such).
I have books but sometimes in a hospital you can’t concentrate.
I’d have an old MP3 player that I use – which I would prefer to a phone as you want to save phone battery for phone calls. BUT I am slowly planning an MP3 Playlist that can help me in whatever mood I am in. My Sensory son is in love with Imagine Dragons, and although I have never really been into them, I was curious as to what their music was all about. Now the CD that we rented from the library is being played 24/7! I have found some very encouraging music (that gives me the “fighting feeling” – instead of “feeling sorry for myself music”) on there – so I am planning on telling my hubby to put it on the playlist. Inspirational quotes? I’m not sure.
Please let me know of any feel -good uplifting music or fun things to keep your mind focused on when in the hospital, or what has helped you personally or people you know: